That's why it is called the present.

todayisagift-pavinee

I have been struggling with something inside me lately. I feel I cannot work on my art as smoothly as I used to as in months ago. I keep thinking of improving my art and shop and have a lot of sketches in my sketchbooks but somehow I cannot produce them into final artwork. I discussed my feelings with my friends and they kindly pointed out why I have become so slow.

First, I'm trapped in the attempt to be perfect. I don't think I'm a perfectionist but maybe I'm subconsciously trying to be. Strangely enough, I went through this kind of perfection struggle once already when I decided to open my shop. Now it comes back to me.

Second, I have been absorbing too much of information. I took e-courses, read a lot of creative business blogs and books. All these information are good helpful things and I'm learning a lot. But it can be a double-edged sword when I cannot organize things in my head well enough. Plus, during the process of learning, I get to know a lot of people and I can't help comparing with them. I know it's a no-no thing for those who work in creative business. Comparing doesn't help, instead, it slows you down and even paralyzes you. I know this too well but still...

I miss myself when I could draw without thinking, just drew and posted my doodles on my Page almost everyday. When I just had fun and get excited with occasional Etsy orders...

But I guess there's always a cure for a problem. Now I know my problem. Someone says that guilt and comparison are not productive. So, I'm going to let those unproductive feelings go and live with the minutes of joy when I draw and paint. Learn as much as I can but won't put too much pressure on myself. I want to be successful in creative business but not as much as to be happy with my art in the present moment, I realize :)

By the way, the drawing above I drew as a sample for a book illustration project. The idea is based on the famous quote :

Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That's why it is called the present.
---Alice Morse Earle

The illustration will look different in the final but this is already perfect for this post and my MerryDay :)

Thanks for coming. I hope you have a merry creative day :)